Into China — Life by Misadventure?

Nei Ho Ma from Hong Kong. I’m gearing-up for China which by all accounts is a grim road for the backpacker. On arrival in the mainland, many tourists are stumped at the squatter door trying to decipher which pictograph means “Men’s”. No English is written or spoken where I’m going.

Heads-up is that Tibet is no fun. I’ll start for West China via the comparatively easy Southern tourist route.

(Comparatively easy. China is an emerging nation, but more than 30 million people still live in caves here.)

For now I’m in Hong Kong where life is easy although a mite expen$ive. The main hostel here is high on a lush mountain top; gorgeous butterflies (some look like birds), praying mantis, dragonflies, juicy snails are everywhere. They found a snake in the air conditioning the other day.

As I sat painting out the corporate logos on my gear, I was reminded again that these slackpacker hangouts are far superior to any 5 Star hotel. We have a comfy self-serve kitchen, plenty of interesting company from all over the world, good ambiance. And INFORMATION. Where to go. How to get there. What to avoid.

Best is the magic view over the Hong Kong harbour. This vista reminds me of the Taj Mahal in that you can watch over it for hours, as the light changes. It is a sort of Vancouver harbour with weird, impressive skyscrapers crowding the water like in Chicago.

An inexpensive treat is the Star Ferry ride between Kowloon (mainland) and Hong Kong island.

The food is great. I lucked into possibly the best Chinese buffet in town. At the famous Peninsula Hotel? No, it’s a mall basement smorg where the shirtless downtown construction workers come to eat lunch.

I also dropped into the annual Hong Kong Food Expo (along with 200,000 friends) where I sampled many strange and unappetising products.

“Roast butter squid, sir?” All had at least triple the necessary packaging.

These Southern (mostly Cantonese speaking) Chinese are familiar. They immigrated all over the world. My impressions of the people?

• They are very slightly built. I’m a stocky, lumbering, light-eyed foreign devil, in comparison. The women are amazingly skinny. The youth do seem to be growing much larger fuelled on KFC and MacDonald’s.

• Asian peoples love to talk on cell phones. They love to ring-up from noisy and crowded locales. (Paul Thereaux claims the Chinese have a national deafness.) My theory is that they feel obliged to call each of their extended family members at least twice every day.

• Young couples love to nuzzle in public. (Or perhaps I’m just noticing.)

• The Chinese are very poor walkers; unskilled in navigation by foot, apparently unaware and unobservant of others. The many unnecessary collisions are ignored … except by Canadians who are obliged to say “Sorry” even when not at fault.

Hong Kong seems to be booming despite the Asian Flu. It turned out to be a gold mine to put a free-enterprise enclave (with a maximum 15% tax rate) right beside a totalitarian superpower. There are wonderful opportunities for crime / business.

And after every great crime, there is a fortune.

Hong Kong reminds me of Calgary during the oil boom; frenzied consumers will buy anything regardless of cost, quality, or utility. Every local I spoke with told me that the recent Chinese takeover from the British was a bad thing, but no one could give me any particular reason why.

For my last days in Hong Kong I moved over to mountainous Lantau Island to tent and test my gear. Lantau has a fantastic, impossible 1-lane roadway with 2-direction traffic. The white-gloved bus drivers baby huge Isuzu buses around the corners with skill and concentration! The Chinese bashed this road through where no road should be. To prevent erosion huge man-made rock walls are needed. I watched as craftsmen carved natural-looking rock out of the poured rough concrete.

Fulfilling job, I think.

Nearby sits the world’s largest Bronze Buddha. About once a week in Asia I visit the Worlds largest _______  _______ Buddha. (fill in the blanks with any two adjectives.)

As I sat and read and watched my big Buddha buddy backlit by the setting sun, I realized I was ready to try China. The next morning I climbed the highest mountain, had a boil-up breakfast of tea and noodles with peanuts, and took in one last exhilarating view of Hong Kong.

Wish me luck!

– Taipan McCharles